Big stuff going on in our household at the moment.
Our 16-year-old dog is declining. She was declining precipitously there for a while, but she seems to be coming back from the brink… for now. We don’t know how much longer we have with her, so every day feels both precious and like it will never be enough.
Covid is… declining? In this region it looks like it’s starting to plateau. Both case counts and hospitalizations are much lower than they were even a month ago, so I’m relaxing some of my mask wearing. When grocery shopping? No mask. When around kids where I volunteer? Mask. Crowded restaurants? Hard pass. Sitting on patios and decks to eat? All in.
Still cooking and baking. When there’s nothing that can be done about a sick dog or cranky parrot, we still need to eat. As I type this I’ve got some experimental chickpea “meat” balls in the oven. I made kofta with black beans last night — a bust because of a rookie mistake on my end — but this chickpea version might be better suited to my taste.
This grand experiment has reinforced a couple of things in my mind.
Number one: I’m really not all that creative as a cook. I mean, I’m really good at following directions (rookie kofta mistake aside), but I’ll never be one of those people who can pull out whatever is in the fridge and make a three-course meal out of it. I mean, I might be able to put together a simple stir-fry, but not much else.
Number 2: While I don’t mind cooking, I’m not passionate about it. I like to eat what I like to eat, and I don’t want to rely on other people to make it for me, so that’s as good a motivation as any, I guess. (And also, our weird dietary preferences and restrictions require some extra attention by someone, and that someone would be me.)
Moving on…
In recent conversations, I have been asked what I do. The answer right now is, not much. I was doing some freelance graphic design before the pandemic. It was not going well, and then it was not going at all. And I’m not going to lie, it was a bit of a relief at the time.
Over the last several years, I’ve gotten very good at volunteering. I didn’t need a salary (thankfully), and was so broken from a work situation that lasted more than a decade where bullying was a thing, that I gravitated toward volunteer situations where I could a) make a tangible impact, and b) wouldn’t be subject to abuse.
I was Spokane Audubon’s newsletter editor for five years, which was super fun. I was a private art tutor for a little while, and got to work with an extraordinary student. While I enjoyed those experiences, I do not wish to repeat them as a volunteer.
I’m a raptor docent at the West Valley Outdoor Learning Center (and have been for the last ten years) — I still love working with the birds, but I’m learning that I need to set better boundaries around the rest of it. Like, maybe I don’t need to be on the hook for cleaning 2x/week — maybe I can be more helpful if I have one regular shift and can help out when other people need to miss their shift.
And now it’s time to figure out what’s next beyond volunteering, and I have no idea. I still don’t need a 9-to-5, and I’m grateful for that. But I also need to figure out a new direction with some different patterns… wish me luck, I guess.
Carmen Yount 